12-Year-Old Accepted Into Worst College Imaginable
WABASH, IN—Emphasizing that her son’s young age had never stopped him from pursuing his dreams, local mother Hannah Butler celebrated Monday when her 12-year-old...
Nation’s Sensitive Kids Denounce NHL Goal Horns
The post Nation’s Sensitive Kids Denounce NHL Goal Horns appeared first on The Onion.
Study: Children Who Play Violent Video Games More Likely To Say ‘That’s Goro’ When...
BOSTON—In startling new research connecting gaming habits with verbal behavior, a Boston College study published Monday found that young children who played violent video...
Study: Infants Respond To Rustling Of Potato Chip Bag As Early As 3 Weeks
ITASCA, IL—In what researchers are hailing as an incredible breakthrough in the understanding of early childhood development, a study published Friday by the American...
42-Year-Old Woman Refers To Herself As ‘Preggerz’
The post 42-Year-Old Woman Refers To Herself As ‘Preggerz’ appeared first on The Onion.
Legislators renew attempt to improve child care access
For the second time in two years, some Oklahoma lawmakers are attempting to address a critical shortage of child care options for parents. “We’ve...
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Sabrina Carpenter Turns Body Fully Inside Out In Horrific New ‘Juno’ Position
INDIO, CA—Generating mixed reactions from festivalgoers during her headline performance at Coachella, pop star Sabrina Carpenter reportedly turned her body fully inside out Friday...
Ford recalling nearly 1.4 million F-150 pickup trucks over unexpected downshift issue
The recall applies to six-speed F-150 vehicles that were produced between March 12, 2014, and August 18, 2017.
Fake Justin Bieber rep pulls off bold $200,000 Coachella E.V. rental heist
"The night before, we get a call for a last-minute request -- four cars to go to Coachella for the headliner," recalled owner Chad...
