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The Onion Staff

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American Voices

Iranian Cyberattacks Target U.S. Water Systems

Animals

Dept. Of Interior Grills Up Nation’s Remaining Endangered Species

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The Rails

Former Print Exclusive

Sex Talk Devolves Into Dad Rambling About Bo Jackson

Food

‘Same Great Taste’ Caveat Mitigates Trauma Of Snack’s New Look

Baseball

Man Came To Funeral Straight From Work

Health + Wellness

Eating Disorders: Myth Vs. Fact

Former Print Exclusive

Everyone Needs To Calm   Down, Reports Man Who Accidentally Shot Someone

Food

The Onion’s Top State Fair Foods

Former Print Exclusive

Antichrist Rolls Eyes Throughout  Peter Thiel Lecture

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Latest article

As Burgum’s troubles intensify at the Interior Department, Trump’s new move won’t help

Around this time three years ago, then-North Dakota Gov. Doug Burgum still had a reputation as a relatively pragmatic Republican with a successful private-sector...

Emergency crews respond to crash involving EMBARK bus

Emergency crews responded after a crash involving a motorcycle and an EMBARK bus Monday morning.

FULL LIST: Dips, salsas sold at major retailers in 26 states recalled over salmonella...

The salsa, dips, guacamole, and more were sold at Kroger, Target, Trader Joe's, Whole Foods, and Walmart locations across half the U.S.