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The Onion Staff

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School

Nation’s Quiet, Gangly Kids In Cargo Pants Announce Plans To Be...

Baseball

Red Sox Fan Throws Back Son Who Caught Yankees Home Run

American Voices

U.S. Lobbying Against Global Plastic Limits

Donald Trump

Trump Posts Disturbing Video Of Himself Twirling With Knives

Entertainment

Top Songs August 2025

Children

HHS Replaces Childhood Vaccination Schedule With List Of Recommended Animal Bites

Basketball

Sophie Cunningham Claims Any Woman Who Averages More Than 8 Points...

Explainer

The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Larry Ellison

Entertainment

Stella Lefty Admits Nepotism May Have Helped Her Get Groupon+

American Voices

SNAP Enrollment Drops By Over 13%

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Latest article

Under Trump, the IRS’ audit revenue falls in predictable and damaging ways

Donald Trump’s second term has been a difficult one for the IRS. The tax agency has struggled with resignations, DOGE-imposed disruptions and the abandonment...

Florida is in dire need of anti-fascism courses. Its students are getting anti-communism lessons...

The new school year is underway in Florida, and public schools are doing so under a new mandate that they implement a K-12 course...

Proof-of-citizenship backers ask Kavanaugh for emergency order ahead of midterms

In the latest Supreme Court litigation ahead of the midterm elections, a Michigan group wants the high court’s help in putting a measure on...