PBR Offers $20,000 Reward For Lost Beer
The CEO of Pabst Brewing Co. put up a $20,000 reward to anyone who could provide information that leads to the recovery of 1,602...
Home Heeled Advantage
The post Home Heeled Advantage appeared first on The Onion.
God Struggling To Remember Why He Made So Many Ugly People
THE HEAVENS—Scratching His head and rifling through His notes as He tried to recall His reasoning for the decision, The Lord God, Supreme Creator...
MapQuest Jumps To Top Of App Store After Refusing To Rename ‘Lake Ontario’
Legacy mapping tool MapQuest shot up to become the top navigation app in Apple’s app store after refusing to comply with President Trump’s executive...
Gloria Steinem, Researcher Who Discovered Existence Of Women, Dead At 92
The post Gloria Steinem, Researcher Who Discovered Existence Of Women, Dead At 92 appeared first on The Onion.
Artist Profile: Ella Langley
Country star Ella Langley is breaking records with her hit song “Choosin’ Texas,” which has now topped the Billboard Hot 100 for 20 weeks....
Google Maps Introduces Crawling Directions For Cyclists Hit By Truck
MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA—Touting the new feature as yet another innovation to help every traveler get where they’re going, Google Maps on Thursday began offering...
Rolo Ad Greatly Overestimates The Social Element Of Eating Rolos
HERSHEY, PA—Calling into question the candy brand’s apparent belief that consuming its chocolate-covered caramels constitutes a lively group activity, viewers told reporters Thursday that...
Tim Kurkjian Quits ‘Baseball Tonight’ After Discovering MMA
BRISTOL, CT—Claiming he was now convinced he had wasted his life covering “a little boy sport,” longtime ESPN analyst Tim Kurkjian announced Wednesday that...
Dark Horse Emerges In Competition For Most Insane Coworker
MARIETTA, GA—After the employee surfaced from out of nowhere to contend with lunatics once thought untouchable, sources at Horizon Insurance Solutions confirmed Tuesday that...
Latest article
Two Oklahoma churches to go without heat due to thieves
Two separate churches will be going without heat this weekend because of thieves, one in Oklahoma City and the other in Wetumka.
Car hits and kills cyclist in Del City Friday morning
Early Friday morning, Del City police responded to multiple 911 calls about a bicyclist and motor vehicle collision near the intersection of Southeast 24th...
Sunny, hot, muggy Labor Day weekend. Remember to pre-hydrate. Record highs are possible next...
EMSA continues the Heat Alert all holiday weekend into next week. Lows and high will be way above normal. The first effort at "some...
