ATHERTON, CA—With a hand-painted sign taped to the front of their fold-up card table, local Bay Area children Rowan and Amanda Denton reportedly opened an adrenochrome stand Wednesday along a busy suburban road. “Adrenochrome! Adrenochrome for sale! Freshly harvested!” said Rowan, 10, who waved at passing Cybertrucks as he poured the biomolecule intravenously drawn from his 7-year-old sister’s pallid body into several plastic cups for neighbors to purchase. “Our dad set up the stand and then our mom helped us put the needle into the adrenal gland, but we oxidized it all by ourselves. We’re trying to make enough money to buy a new basketball hoop, and this corner is the best spot because all of the tech billionaires live up that hill. Plus, nothing is better than a nice, cold elixir of youth on a hot summer day. We’ve already sold 3,000 milliliters!” Passersby confirmed Rowan was later seen hurrying inside to grab his basketball after the adrenochrome stand had earned enough bitcoin to purchase the Chase Center
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