IndyCars set to race on streets of nation’s capital. Here’s what to know

Sports
President Donald Trump is transforming the streets around the National Mall in Washington, D.C., this weekend into an IndyCar motorsports mecca for the first time.
Read more

Dead Fantasy Football Commissioner’s Password Guessed Again

Sports
The post Dead Fantasy Football Commissioner’s Password Guessed Again appeared first on The Onion.
Read more

Little League World Series Game Turned Off Due To Neither Team Having Big Fat...

Sports
BUFFALO, NY—Audibly groaning before declaring the event “a major letdown” compared to competitions in previous years, local baseball fan Dylan St. John reportedly switched...
Read more

Report: Tennis-Racket-Shaped Bag Gotta Be Full Of Tennis Rackets

Sports
ESTES PARK, CO—Noting the bag’s elongated oval shape, prominent Wilson logo, and the fact that its owner was walking directly toward a tennis court,...
Read more

‘Do You Have Any Idea Who I Am?’ Jalen Brunson Shouts At Librarian Refusing...

Sports
NEW YORK—Slamming both hands on the circulation desk after learning he was 17th in line for Larry McMurtry’s Pulitzer Prize–winning Western novel, Knicks star...
Read more

Announcers Watch Angels-Royals Game In Total Silence

Sports
The post Announcers Watch Angels-Royals Game In Total Silence appeared first on The Onion.
Read more

No One Translated To Foreign Players Why They Currently In Cornfield

Sports
The post No One Translated To Foreign Players Why They Currently In Cornfield appeared first on The Onion.
Read more

Manager Calls Bullpen Just To Say Hi

Sports
The post Manager Calls Bullpen Just To Say Hi appeared first on The Onion.
Read more

Doughy Eastern European Man Tired Of Everyone Assuming He’s NBA Superstar

Sports
MCCOOK, IL—Complaining that he couldn’t even walk down the street without being mistaken for a world-class basketball player, doughy Eastern European immigrant Vukašin Petrović...
Read more

Marlins Jumbotron Displays Message Saying Free Trial Of ABS System Has Ended

Sports
The post Marlins Jumbotron Displays Message Saying Free Trial Of ABS System Has Ended appeared first on The Onion.
Read more
12Page 1 of 2

Latest article

Trump administration’s 75-country visa ban was illegal, judge rules

The U.S. stopped issuing visas for citizens of 75 countries because it said they were likely to need public assistance. A judge ruled the...

Silver Alert issued for 71-year-old Oklahoma man missing since Tuesday

POND CREEK, Okla (KFOR) - Oklahoma Highway Patrol issued a Silver Alert at the request of the Guthrie Police Department for 71-year-old Jerry Golden,...

Nancy Kassebaum Baker, former U.S. senator from Kansas, dies at 94

TOPEKA, Kan. (AP) — Nancy Kassebaum Baker, a Kansas governor’s daughter who became the first woman elected to the U.S. Senate without following a...